Accept it

A much-need vacation allowed me time to relax and to ponder about what's been really important lately in life. A simple outlook from my cousin-in-law that we should all move to Australia simply because it is indeed a way of living we can all get used to in time to come. He is already past his 40s and I guess has seen much of the life in Singapore and perhaps has come to accepting how Singapore will be and what will not change.

We had conversations over breakfasts about local politics and directions our country is moving in, and as we slowly peel away the wonderful stress-free living in Perth with HDB housing prices buying acres of lands or fancy houses by the beach, we ask ourselves why do people leave Singapore since apparently our government painted such a wonderful picture of our future of casinos and JB homes for our aged.

I paused during my flight home (nothing seems to stop the sadness of leaving Perth) to finally stop to think if we can really change the world we live in. Besides an occasional pat on the back to provide brillant solve-it all solutions instead of whining and crapping, can I perhaps choose to accept the fact that we are living in a socialist authoritarian state (which somehow I find that term used in many other nations' newspapers labelled on my beloved country). The sooner I accept the fact that we are deemed as under dictatorship rule, the sooner I wake up to making real plans to live free and "change" my world. Why waste time on working on something which might be futile. I am not a martyr in the making, or should I stay on to bear witness to a "change" which a first black American President paints. We have lived long enough in the country to know what kind of friends and colleagues we have and how Singaporeans are. It is not possible for change. Our very own Singaporean characteristics of "kiasi - scared to die" is a public declaration that "change" won't come to us. I am but a simple engineer trying hard to make sense of life and knowing what is right and wrong and what is to live free. So many have chosen to live as second-class citizens in a foreign land, away from family and friends, at such a price in exchange for? Really..a cheap beach house with lots of "change"? A price to pay to tear away your way of living in search of a better future like the migrant Hongkongers we found in Perth serving wonderful Chinese food. They probably left on the possible 1997 handover to China which might have been a bleak picture then, or perhaps just a search for a better life.

I guess for me, it will be to stop denying myself from buying two cars for the price of one here. And perhaps finally get a chance to vote for once in my life. The need to know you have a right, a choice seems to begin since the cross + came about. We all have a need to decide which path to take when the opportunity presents itself. Be it right or wrong, its nice to know I can choose - and its time to choose to accept it.